I am a firm believer that are experiences make us who were are. They mold, shape and even redirect us. Sometimes we as educators underestimate the value of a personal experience. I believe we often want to take to much accountability and responsibility for students actions, decisions, and direction. The reality is if I took the direct path (or the one my parents or even teachers envisioned) to my current place in life, I would not fully be able to appreciate the value of where I am and the experiences that have allowed me to embark on this journey.
My journey in education started in second grade. I went to a catholic school, and had received a failing grade on my report card. I was embarrassed, upset and devastated, and my journey of failure began at that point. It was discovered that i could not read (in the second grade). For that reason my parents transferred me to a public school where services were thought to be better, and they were a bit. I worked with a resource specialist during reading while I was in 3rd, 4th and 5th grade. Once I moved onto middle school the services were lost, as well as in high school. The cycle continued of me being just a step behind the other students, just barely scraping by and receiving borderline and failing grades each quarter. I did somehow manage to get into a college (remedial program) and scraped by again for my first semester and failed out my second semester. Not want to officially be a "college dropout", I joined the United States Marine Corps.
This experience changed my life in many ways. The first way was finally being accepted and even excelling in hands on activity and physical fitness and training. I fit in and even was a step ahead in many areas. I began to realize that even though I often did not learn at a rate or style similar to my peer and that the teachers would have preferred, I was able to learn and excel, even in academic areas.
The second and most profound way the Marine Corps CHANGED my life was with a deployment to Iraq in 2004. The number one lesson learned and even missed to this day was family and community. In Iraq I was a part of a community that no questions asked would have laid down their life for me, and I would have done the same for them. Even if I personally did not like or agree with an individual, we knew there was an unwritten rule; emotions and opinions would be pushed to the wayside and each others wellbeing was a priority. No where in this country is there a similar unwritten rule (for me anyway).
Also, while in Iraq I witnessed a culture that embraced family and community. The Iraqi people easily invited us into their homes for flat bread and chi-tea while out on long foot patrols. These families also embraced one another, and often there were generations living on a small piece of land. I also began to see the value in my own family and loved ones who supported me mentally and emotionally with letters and emails, and even physically with endless care packages that would be dispersed among other Marines as well as the Iraqi people.
The transition home was a hellish nightmare for about 3 years, where I easily turned my back on my loved ones and my family. Plagued with nightmares, flash backs, heightened alertness and an anger I could not understand I was lost and disconnected from my family, missing my Marine Corps brothers and the combat zone that easily felt like home. I was left to wonder why I made it home and others did not. I feared I did not do enough, and could have done more. I questioned weather I should pursue another deployment, because it seemed WAY easier. Thankfully my loved ones and family did not turn their back on me, and I did not take my own life, which seemed easy but would hurt so many others, therefore I was willing to live with the pain and torture in my head.
I am not sure how, why or exactly when, but I became willing to make some changes and realize the amazing experience I had been through, as well as the life around me. I began to engage in family and activities that I enjoyed. I realized the only way to have a strong community is to be a part of it and contribute.
NON-NEGOTIABLES:
1. Everyone learns differently and at different rates (and that is OK)
2. A community is only as strong as what you are putting into it
My journey in education started in second grade. I went to a catholic school, and had received a failing grade on my report card. I was embarrassed, upset and devastated, and my journey of failure began at that point. It was discovered that i could not read (in the second grade). For that reason my parents transferred me to a public school where services were thought to be better, and they were a bit. I worked with a resource specialist during reading while I was in 3rd, 4th and 5th grade. Once I moved onto middle school the services were lost, as well as in high school. The cycle continued of me being just a step behind the other students, just barely scraping by and receiving borderline and failing grades each quarter. I did somehow manage to get into a college (remedial program) and scraped by again for my first semester and failed out my second semester. Not want to officially be a "college dropout", I joined the United States Marine Corps.
This experience changed my life in many ways. The first way was finally being accepted and even excelling in hands on activity and physical fitness and training. I fit in and even was a step ahead in many areas. I began to realize that even though I often did not learn at a rate or style similar to my peer and that the teachers would have preferred, I was able to learn and excel, even in academic areas.
The second and most profound way the Marine Corps CHANGED my life was with a deployment to Iraq in 2004. The number one lesson learned and even missed to this day was family and community. In Iraq I was a part of a community that no questions asked would have laid down their life for me, and I would have done the same for them. Even if I personally did not like or agree with an individual, we knew there was an unwritten rule; emotions and opinions would be pushed to the wayside and each others wellbeing was a priority. No where in this country is there a similar unwritten rule (for me anyway).
Also, while in Iraq I witnessed a culture that embraced family and community. The Iraqi people easily invited us into their homes for flat bread and chi-tea while out on long foot patrols. These families also embraced one another, and often there were generations living on a small piece of land. I also began to see the value in my own family and loved ones who supported me mentally and emotionally with letters and emails, and even physically with endless care packages that would be dispersed among other Marines as well as the Iraqi people.
The transition home was a hellish nightmare for about 3 years, where I easily turned my back on my loved ones and my family. Plagued with nightmares, flash backs, heightened alertness and an anger I could not understand I was lost and disconnected from my family, missing my Marine Corps brothers and the combat zone that easily felt like home. I was left to wonder why I made it home and others did not. I feared I did not do enough, and could have done more. I questioned weather I should pursue another deployment, because it seemed WAY easier. Thankfully my loved ones and family did not turn their back on me, and I did not take my own life, which seemed easy but would hurt so many others, therefore I was willing to live with the pain and torture in my head.
I am not sure how, why or exactly when, but I became willing to make some changes and realize the amazing experience I had been through, as well as the life around me. I began to engage in family and activities that I enjoyed. I realized the only way to have a strong community is to be a part of it and contribute.
NON-NEGOTIABLES:
1. Everyone learns differently and at different rates (and that is OK)
2. A community is only as strong as what you are putting into it